What Is gruntose.com?

Cryonic Suspension Ends

After a long sleep, buried comfortably in the back 40 of the neuron farm, Gruntose stirs.  The rants have been kicked out and the possibility of meditative stabilization re-arises.  Sources start to percolate, blossoming somewhat with updated documentation finally.  The Gruntose moment, like cat drool caught in amber caught in time saving nine, provides yet another window into the heart of phenonema occurring coincident with all the other phenomena.  But we have huge hopes for the future.  Real peace once we get these hawks a fat gopher to chew on.  Serious advances in human consciousness, re-energization of the common man as a thinking being, the internet continuing as the great knowledge equalizer, so much promise if we can hold this stuff together.  We are science fiction but we can choose what type we will be.  Eschew Blithely.

Not Just for Stuff Any More!

We at Gruntose think it's important for every web dweller to get a sample of our strong opinion soup. That's why the rant box has appeared up there on the top page. This is notably noxious to some who might happen to be of the opposite political viewpoints or of contrary opinions of equal or greater strength, which is most everyone. Well, all we can really think to say is this: if you want to express your opinions, get your own web site. Gruntose is ours. We are Gruntose. You will be opinionized upon.

That being said, the non-opinion stuff really is offered up to the world at large in the hopes something in there might be useful someday. The source code is possibly the most useful offering and will actually compile and run, given proper incantations. We are working on improving the spellbooks almost daily and hope to offer really useful documentation for everything soon. Really soon. Soon, Really. On internet time... circa 1952. Anyway, it is our dream to have a fully self-documenting source code repository along with the other priceless junk we have up here on Gruntose.

Everything That Our Old Site Twain.COM was and *MORE*.  Way MORE.  Lots MORE.  Like the paragraph below.

We've moved to a new location, but our feisty devotion to give away a lot of stuff for nothing (at zero cost to us and even less to you) persists.  The name has changed, but the contents remain, and they continue to progress towards some kind of enlightened digital consciousness.  Or so our guru (Shrill Swami Skankibanana) tells us.

Okay, your guess is as good as ours.

A park bench that isn't targeted by birds?  A lounge chair in the middle of an overgrown cul-de-sac?  The apricot with 8 eyes and 3 elbows?  A conundrum within a mystery within a run-on without a clue?  The answer to life's one big question and how you can make money from it?  An utter abyss of wasted hours and broken dreams?  The pope's second to worst fear?  A liberal pulpit with a hidden switch that turns on the fan?  Tomorrow's vision of yesterday?  Today's memory of tomorrow's boring tuna-wiggle dinner on a time thread abandoned by eating out?  (What the hell does that mean?)  Leaves of brown crumbling under the squirrel's frantic traversal of its remembered nut map after a summer of eating the wrong kind of mushrooms?  Or just an innate tolerance to the tranquility that enfolds the woods between worlds?  A long-winded babbling rant by a near-human key twiddler?  Would it matter?

Could you be more specific?

Gruntose is free.  You will never be charged for anything here unless and until the universe changes (e.g., Johnny Cash stops wearing black, dogmatic one-true-faithers realize they're one of many, Dennis Miller comes out of the closet...  as a conservative child-hating nixon worshipper, the stupid san andreas fault gets over its blame complex and heals itself as 14,000 druidic monks wave crystals over it, Rush Limbaugh starts making sense, etcetera yahta yahta and so forth...  the point here is improbability, people).  If you notice that anything on this site infringes on copyrights, patents, or anything else only a truckload of new lawyers on spring break even claims to understand the full implications of, please inform us of this immediately.  Only litigation-free materials should be warehoused here for your perusal.

is this some kind of joke?

yes and no.  okay, yes.

Realistically though, all information here at gruntose.com and most related properties of feisty meow® concerns, ltd. are protected under the GNU GPL.  The strict terms of the GNU General Public License apply to source code for executable programs, but please warp this document to the best of your abilities into a license for bitmaps, web pages and variegated informational tidbits that reside here also.  In essence, anything available on this site is yours to re-use as you see fit, but with the provision that you leave any original copyright information intact per the original author's requests, and in the rare instance that the file is intellectual property of gruntose.com, then please credit gruntose.com as the source of the material in a publicly visible manner.  Note that the accreditation clause only applies to the material that we have actually developed (such as the web pages under Gruntose and almost all of the background images, any original artwork or sounds, etc); any material with other owners follows their particular copyrights and trademarks, although we have done our best to ensure that nothing with an active, exclusive copyright is present on the site.  Some might see these licensing statements as a legally threatening maneuver, but this is really just to state that (1) there are some things we have developed for this site and that we feel a sense of kinship with and (2) that you may re-use content here how you like providing that you're not just reselling the contents of this site and claiming them as your own.  If this verbal salad means nothing to you, just remember that the copyright deities will probably give you itchy hemorrhoids for life if you try to misrepresent the materials of gruntose.com.  So there.

Gruntose Stats and Other Detritus

Here are the available automated stats.

Contact Info

You have reached the end of the page.  Stop here.  Do not go on.  Otherwise you will be assaulted by a collection of knick-knacks and doo-dads.
Better be careful.  Just stop here.
We warned you...

[kaleidoscope]   po  bigger rev  wheel1  rev earth  scroll
  fred letteruswheel2
pointy freedom s'alright counted
doug rocksboborope skelly
calnerdio nerdio, wherefore art thou?hob

Nope, sorry, you can't send email with those gizmos.
And now you've really done it.  We did warn you.  This is the end of this page.
Not the end of the internet, just the end of this particular page.
Ending...  *now*
The End.
Of this page.  End.  Done.
There is no more page here.  Fine, just sit there staring at the moving pictures.  I'm out of here...